Trump Changes Mind on Wall After Reading Online Publication

In a surprising turn of events that transpired quickly and naturally after Donald John Trump’s address to the nation this past Tuesday, February 5th, Mr. Trump suddenly announced a change of heart for the iconic wall he had promised to build along the Southern U.S. border.

“A wall would be great, really tremendous,” he said in front of a handful of Fox News reporters, “but there is something that would be even greater.”

The idea of the greater project, he shared, had occurred to him after getting his hands on an online publication different from Fox News, his typical tabloid of choice, which is not only the tabloid most closely aligned to his views, but is, in fact, also the one fully committed to expressing exclusively these views after listening carefully to him to find out what his views are.

In the new publication, which had turned up unexpectedly when he had inadvertently made a search typo, there had been a real photo of three clearly non-American-born humanoids photographed in the desert of New Mexico earlier that same Tuesday.

The picture, Trump shared, had given him the chills.

“They were clearly not the best people,” said Trump. “They were not White Caucasian males, they were bringing drugs, crime, raping women, taking American jobs.”

This is when Trump had a revelation.

“They had not come through the Southern Border,” he shared. “They had landed in New Mexico in a round saucer-shaped craft that had entered American space through the upper stratosphere.”

“A wall,” he said, “would not stop criminals like them. What we need is a dome.”

He did not elaborate further. He just waved his hand at the reporters, and gave them a smile.

“A beautiful dome. And these three illegals will pay for it.”

– – –

News Sense News is a SATIRICAL blog of FAKE NEWS that aims to showcase, criticize and ridicule corruption, ignorance and narrow-mindedness. It is often inspired by very, very real news.

Mexico to Pay for the Wall

On Thursday, January 10, Donald Trump answered one of the questions that has been asked by every American ever since he, Trump, announced that he would run for president: How will Mexico pay for the wall that he has promised to build?

“Mexico will pay for it indirectly,” he stated, stressing the word indirectly, but providing no further details, since the American people who voted for him do not need anything more in terms of an explanation.

Trump also went ahead and answered a few other burning questions that are on minds of many Americans. On the subject of the thousands of Federal employees who are currently not getting paid because of his decision to shut down the Government, and who have started working secondary jobs to make ends meet, he said:

“They are getting paid indirectly.”

To most of his supporters, including those that are not getting paid, this answer is sufficient, as they do not care about getting paid as much as they care about listening to what Trump has to say.

Given the collapsing economy, which Trump has called “booming”, as well as the current lack of Government, as well as the many military leaders who have recently left his administration, leaving our military without critical leadership, as well as the most recent findings of Robert Mueller that there is unquestionable evidence of collusion with Russia during Trump’s campaign which may amount to treason, many have asked the question, is America still winning?

“America is winning indirectly,” Trump said, thus allowing his supporters to ease their fears without using their brains unnecessarily to try to figure the answer themselves.

– – –

News Sense News is a SATIRICAL blog of FAKE NEWS that aims to showcase, criticize and ridicule corruption, ignorance and narrow-mindedness. It is often inspired by very, very real news.