Several dozen members of the Thighs of Steel Gym in Brooklyn, NY, started their new year with disappointment after a broken elevator at their gym prevented them from starting the new year with a workout.
“Disappointment doesn’t even begin to describe it,” complained an animated Dina Cliff, a loyal member of the gym since the late 1990s. “I had been looking forward to this day for more than two years. I promised myself back at the end of 2012 that 2015 will be a year of active, regular exercise. And today, I found out that the elevator to my gym is broken. What am I supposed to do? Take the stairs?”
The popular gym occupies the spacious third floor of a large sports complex. The ground floor houses a swimming pool, and the floor above it houses basketball courts.
“I joined this gym because it has a large and convenient parking lot,” said New York resident Charlie Guttendobber. Most other gyms close by don’t have parking lots, and you need to park a quarter mile away to get to them. Who is going to walk a quarter mile just so they can exercise?”
Thighs of Steel has other amenities too. It features convenient moving walkways allowing patrons to commute between different gym equipment without the inconvenience of walking. There are also bellhops that help patrons carry their gym bags from their cars to the locker rooms.
There is, however, a single elevator. And when on January 1, 2015, it broke down, dozens of gym patrons got stranded in the lobby, unable to get to their planned exercise.
The gym is looking to urgently hire emergency personnel who can help carry patrons on their backs up and down the stairs while the elevator is being fixed. They are also investing in an infrastructural improvement of the building that would allow installation of escalators which can be used as an alternative if the only elevator fails again.
– – –
News Sense News is a satirical blog that aims to, well, make fun of things.