Donald Trump Has Never Heard of the KKK

Republican Presidential Candidate Donald John Trump commented today on CNN on the endorsement he received from the white supremacist group Ku Klux Klan (KKK) by admitting that he is not familiar with the group.

“Kay Kay What?” he asked CNN journalist Jake Tapper who was conducting the interview. “Never even heard of them. What do they do?”

Tapper explained that the KKK is a neo-Nazi white supremacist group that professes hate towards Blacks, Homosexuals, Women, Foreigners, and pretty much anyone who is not an unemployed, uneducated, white male.

“Doesn’t sound familiar,” said Trump.

They wear white robes and pointy white hoods, explained Tapper. They hold armed rallies similar to the rallies of ISIS.

Trump simply shook his head. “I have no idea who you are talking about,” he said.

They used to kill Black men, women and children simply because of the color of their skin, and used to burn crosses. Very recently, the group inspired the terrorist attack on a church in Charleston, South Carolina which killed nine people.

“Sorry,” said Trump. “There are many groups out there. It’s hard to keep track.”

“However,” he said, “I am not even the least bit surprised. Everyone endorses me. People love me. I am the greatest person who ever lived. We will make America great again!”

Listen to the actual interview here.

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News Sense News is a satirical blog of fake news that aims to criticize and ridicule human ignorance and narrow-mindedness.

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Relevant sources:

Indiana Court Sentences Purvi Patel To Be Beheaded in Public

Purvi_Patel_Sue_Brounlin

On Monday, 3/30, Indiana court sentenced 33 years old Purvi Patel for having an involuntary miscarriage.

“The way I see it,” said Sue Ellen Braunlin, doctor and co-president of the Indiana Religious Coalition for Reproductive Justice, “God decided that Mrs. Patel deserves to lose her child. He taketh the child away. It is our responsibility to carry out the rest of God’s will and make sure Mrs. Patel suffers as much as humanly possible given the short amount of time we have to act.”

Indiana Governor Michael Richard “Mike” Pence defended the court’s decision.

“Our God, praise be to Him, had spoken,” he said.

Mrs. Patel is to be lashed 30 times and then beheaded in public for her unintentional action.

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News Sense News is a satirical blog that aims to criticize and ridicule ignorance and narrow-mindedness.

Author’s note: The above is not funny. Not at all. Purvi Patel was indeed sentenced to 20 years in prison in Indiana for having a miscarriage. She may not have been beheaded, but the the difference is a matter of degree. This is ISIS operating in the United States under a different religion. The value of satire is to raise awareness. I hope this blog demonstrates how perverse things can become when the religious conservatives choose to operate with 18th century mentality.