On Friday, 4/5, Donald Trump announced his pick for the next Minister of Archaeology, little known but otherwise very prominent scientist Professor Bozidar Dimitrov. Dimitrov will be setting the course for all future Archaeological work done within the boundaries or on behalf of the United States.
Dimitrov’s work includes impressive finds such as the skeleton of a mermaid and a skeleton of a Centaur, both un-earthed in an unspecified Mediterranean country a little more than a decade ago. Self-educated and self-employed, Mr. Dimitrov is very much a self-made person, not unlike Trump himself.
Buoyed by the news, Professor Dimitrov told our reporters that he had immediately rolled up his sleeves and done some Archaeological work in his own backyard right away, finding, to his great surprise, a small wooden piece of Noah’s Ark and some skeletal remains of avian origin, likely from birds that got saved in the Ark during the Flood.
Many of Professor Dimitrov’s finds are dated back almost 6000 years, very close to, to quote Dimitrov himself, “the actual beginning of the world”.
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