Fox News has uncovered some shocking new information that may help explain the incomprehensible recent victories of American Democracy: the Obamacare subsidy vote that ensured that Obamacare is here to stay, and the legalization of Gay Marriage in all 50 states.
“Fox discovered that Obama kidnapped the children of Justice Roberts and Justice Kennedy, and held a knife against their throats to force their fathers’ votes,” said Fox News TV Host Bill O’Reilly. “But first,” said O’Reilly, “he decapitated their pets and made them watch.”
According to Fox News, this newly discovered Fox New Fact invalidates both Supreme Court votes, since they were cast under duress and fear.
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