Oldest Dinosaur Fossil Discovered under a Church in Salt Lake City Utah

Dinosaur_Bones

A 235 million-years-old fossil of a triceratops was accidentally found under the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Salt Lake City, UT, during planned work to re-enforce the foundation of this magnificent historic building.

“This did not happen,” announced Reverend Thomas Winterton. “No one has found anything this old, because nothing this old exists. Everyone knows that the world was created a little over 6000 years ago.”

“This being said,” said Winterton, “the construction crew working on the foundation of the church did find some bones.”

What kind of creature were these bones from?

“They said they are from some kind of a dinosaur.”

But dinosaurs went extinct on Earth some 65 million years ago?

“No, they didn’t. 65 million years ago, there weren’t any dinosaurs, because there was nothing at that time. The world was created 6000 years ago.”

So, you are saying that this dinosaur was a recent one?

“It must have been. If you think about it, there’s no other option. The world was created 6000 years ago, so, this creature must have lived later than that.”

Carbon analysis of the bones seems to indicate that they are 235 million years old.

“It must be wrong. The world didn’t exist 235 million years ago, since it was created only 6000 years ago.”

Are you saying that carbon decay is not a reliable way to judge age?

“What I am saying is that there’s obviously something wrong with that calculation. The world was created 6000 years ago, so, the analysis must have been done incorrectly.”

Carbon analysis was used to determine the age of the Shroud of Turin. Can we trust these findings?

“That’s different. In this case, the calculation matches our knowledge. It doesn’t contradict the notion that the world was created 6000 years ago. So, it must be correct.”

What is the importance of the find and how does it impact the church in whose foundation it was discovered?

“It’s a reminder from God that we should question everything that tests our faith and not take anything at face value, especially claims that contradict the notions that we already know to be universally true. Start with what you know, in this case, the undisputed fact that the world was created 6000 years ago, and you should be able to come up with the only logical conclusion that makes sense: nothing 235 million years old was found at the foundations of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Salt Lake City.”

News Sense News is a satirical blog that likes to, well, make fun of things.

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